"Englih is stupid, it not makes sense."

Dearly Beloved,
We are gathered here today in the computer lab in a race against the clock....
Alright, so here's the deal. We are officially doing 100% SYL, and so far everyone is participating 100%. You might ask me "how is that possible? I’m sure not everyone is speaking 100% in Russian!" I would reply with two words: "Capital Punishment"....well, almost. So remember how I have a bag of dried anchovies? Well, I'm actually using it. The rule is, the first time someone slips and says something in English, nothing happens, but the second time they speak in English, they have to eat a dried anchovy (by the way, i tried one of them, and they are terrible, I almost threw up). The next time the person speaks in English, and for every time after that, their companion must eat an anchovy. So far only two people have had to eat an anchovy. Today i accidently said something in English, so I hope I don’t mess up again.
Also, Elder Rusell got his travel plans a few days ago. He is going to Samara, and for some reason, elders going to Samara leave a week earlier than everyone else. I should get my travel plans by next Tuesday and there should be no problems with the visa.
I have seen Elder Andrew Taylor quite a bit, and now he's gone to the MTC in Guatemala. If only...
All the weeks are mashing together, and I don’t remember...
Thanks for the Shopka Papa, I totally dig it! and the octopus anatomy chart is great. Octo-pies are just giant organ sacks...way cool!
...what i was saying...
sounds like all is well in the outside world...not so much in the motherland though...hope that...clears up.
Dear sterling. I hope you thoroughly enjoyed the dried anchovies.
well. That’s that. I think I’m going to go buy an Armenian shirt today. and so...yeah
English is stupid, it not makes sense.
Love and such,
Elder пал